Shen Qianyu wanted to take Song to save a house on the outskirts of Beijing, but his body kept coming back and forth, and he never got around to it.
After the disease passed, Shen Qianyu lost a lot of weight, and the problems with his knees became more and more serious. Sometimes he would feel unbearable after standing for a long time.
Next spring, he will be able to take a walk in the courtyard.
The spring day is no longer cold, but Shen Qianyu is covered in thick furs, and he holds a heater in his arms while sitting in the courtyard basking in the sun.
He mentioned several times that no one needed to bother carrying him out, but Song Wan warmly refused.
The sun was hot at noon, and after being exposed to the sun, he could sleep better at night. Only then did Song Wan persevere.
Sitting with him in the small courtyard, beads of sweat appeared on Song Wan's forehead.
Shen Qianyu looked distressed and stretched out his hand in front of her.
"What's wrong, are you feeling hot?"
Holding Shen Qianyu's hand, Song Wan said, "If it gets too hot, I'll ask Liu Yao to take you back to the house."
Shen Qianyu shook his head: "It's nothing, I just feel guilty, thinking about not being able to take you back to the other courtyard."
When he was in his prime, his palms were slender and full, but now that he is so thin, his joints are particularly obvious.
Song Wan lowered his head and rubbed his hand carefully, his fingertips slowly tracing across the dark scar: "Why should a husband and wife feel guilty?"
"As long as you are by my side, I am content wherever you are."
"Always guilty."
Shen Qianyu murmured: "I am married to you, but I have not been able to maintain good health, and I have suffered a lot in recent years, which has made you worried and mentally exhausted all the time."
"If I had known today, I would have taken more care of my body and not done so many dangerous things in the past few years."
He has always been firm in his choices throughout his life and has never regretted it.
Shen Qianyu always felt that words of repentance were just excuses made by fools and weaklings.
Anyone who can control the future in his own hands will not waste time on the mistakes of the past. If you make a wrong move, there are always millions of choices ahead to find another life, but you won't know how to regret until you get to this point.
"If I could say one or two flattering words when I was young in Nanqing, I might be able to spend three or five more days with Wan'er now."
"If I had known how to be flattering when I was young and made Qin Zhan brother and sister happy, maybe I would have avoided being thrown into the mastiff fighting ring again and again."
"If I... could break all my bones and escape in the snow for a night, I might as well accompany Wan'er back to the courtyard in the suburbs of Beijing today to enjoy the full moon again."
He regrets.
He regretted it.
"Wan'er, I'm not willing to give in."
Pulling Song Wan's wrist hard, Shen Qianyu said, "I'm not willing to be with you for only a few decades."
"I'm not willing to go out with you when we have no duties or responsibilities."
"Obviously there should be a chance."
Shen Qianyu choked with sobs: "You don't know, there is a place in Nanqing called Yunlihai. When the sun rises there, vast waves of smoke will roll up in the clouds, as if the sky and the earth have turned upside down, and the sea has entered the clouds."
"I want to take you to see the scenery."
"Wan'er, did you know that there is a kind of light white flower growing by the Su River? It looks ordinary, but has a very fragrant smell, and it blooms everywhere in spring and summer. It's like being in a sea of flowers."
"That scene is extremely beautiful."
He held Song Wan's hand harder and harder: "But now I can't do anything."
"I really want to take you to see it."
When Song Wan heard this, he arched his eyebrows and smiled softly: "But I can't bear it anymore."
"When I was a widow in the Chengyang Marquis Mansion, I once thought that if I could get out of the courtyard, I would even listen to the noise of people. But after I met you, I didn't want to go anywhere."
"With you by my side, even though it's not a hundred years, one day is better than a hundred years."
Raising his hand to touch Shen Qianyu's white hair, Song Wan stroked his temples again: "I haven't lived a hundred years, but you and I will grow old together..."
"The results have been excellent."
Shen Qianyu's eyes were hot and he smiled lightly.
After spring and summer, autumn and winter ushered in. Shen Qianyu's health was good and bad, and Song Wan was by his side tirelessly every day.
The couple got up early and ate some white porridge and pickles together. At noon, one took a nap on the couch and the other took a nap on the Arhat bed.
Occasionally, when Shen Qianyu was sweating while sleeping, Song Wan would help him wipe it clean with a handkerchief dipped in warm water.
"Thank you very much."
"Why bother?"
Song Wan helped Shen Qianyu massage his stiff and cold legs little by little, and suddenly smiled and said, "I was very tormented when I was pregnant with Yan. Didn't you also massage my legs like this at night?"
During that period, her legs often sprained and the pain was unbearable, but Song Wan never worried about it.
Just because whenever she felt uncomfortable, Shen Qianyu would feel it.
But now, it's just her taking care of him.
"Did you ever find it hard to take care of me at that time?"
Shen Qianyu said: "Of course I haven't."
Song Wan smiled when he heard this: "Me too."
“It’s not hard work, and it’s as enjoyable as sweet rice.”
Filling the soup pot made of pure copper with hot water, Song Wan wrapped it in a thick cotton towel and stuffed it into Shen Qianyu's quilt to keep away the cold.
"Wan'er."
"Um?"
"How about we go to a villa in the suburbs of Beijing tomorrow? If we don't have enough time, I want to go there to spend the rest of my life with you."
"not good."
Song Wan smiled and said: "I know what you are thinking, why do you want to go to that other courtyard in the suburbs of Beijing? You just remember that you promised to take me back, but you never fulfilled this promise, and you have some obsession in your heart. "
He kept his promise, no matter how big or small it was, he would do it no matter what.
But now is not a good time for him to fulfill his promise.
"The small courtyard in the palace is warm, and there are imperial doctors at your side at all times. This place is more suitable for you to recuperate than other hospitals in the suburbs of Beijing."
He patted Shen Qianyu, who was still stubborn, and said, "Don't worry about this anymore. You owe me."
Seeing that he wanted to talk, Song Wan smiled and said: "In the next life, you will come find me in the next life and repay this love."
"Okay, I will definitely look for you again in the next life to repay the love I owe you in this life."
After saying this, Shen Qianyu felt relieved and no longer bothered about going to the outskirts of Beijing.
Three more years later, Shen Qianyu's body was already exhausted. Most of the time he was in a coma and unaware of the world.
Song Wan was still waiting beside him quietly as before. During the day when he was sleeping, she would tend to the flowers and plants or chat with Heng Zhi about household matters and talk about the past.
But no matter when Shen Qianyu wakes up, she will always be by his side.
One day in midsummer, Shen Qianyu suddenly stood up.
"Wan'er?"
"I am here."
He stretched out his hands and grabbed them randomly in the air a few times. Seeing this, Song Wan quickly held his hand.
Shen Qianyu turned his head, looked at Song Wan and said with tears, "Wan'er, I seem to have slept for a long time."
"It seems like I haven't seen you for a long time."
"I just saw him yesterday."
Shen Qianyu shook his head: "I don't remember."
He stretched out his hand in front of Song Wan and gently stroked her cheek.
After being together for many years, why could he still not get enough of the woman in front of him?
The fingertips slid between her eyebrows, and Shen Qianyu's heart ached.
His Wan'er is much older.
The woman no longer has the fair skin she had when she was a teenager, and her cheeks without makeup also show faint blue spots. But her eyes have never changed. Over time, her eyes still retain the tenderness and softness they had when they were a young couple.
"Wan'er."
"I am here."
"Don't hate me, don't hate me because I will leave before you."
Shen Qianyu's eyes were cloudy and his words were vague: "Wan'er, I'm afraid."
"I'm afraid..."
His palms were very strong, as if a strange force burst out from the bottom of his heart. He held Song Wan's hand and never let go for a long time.
"Don't be afraid, I'm here, no matter where you are, I'll be there."
"Yan'er..."
"You want to see Yan'er?"
Shen Qianyu raised his head and looked at Song Wan, crying silently: "Let Yan'er take good care of you."
"If I leave, you should eat more meat and keep someone by your side at night."
"I know."
Tears fell on the two people's clasped hands, Song Wan's heart ached sharply, and he was reluctant to let go.
"Don't cry, you don't like to cry."
Shen Qianyu looked at Song Wan, his eyes full of nostalgia.
"After I leave, I will not enter the Shen family's imperial mausoleum. You ask Shen Shiyan to find a place with beautiful scenery for the two of us."
"good."
"If after I leave, the national mourning will be changed to the 21st, people will be allowed to get married and the market will be open."
"Don't delay the livelihood of all people."
"good."
"Xiao'er..."
Song Wan said: "I asked Yan'er to write a letter to Xiao'er, so I can make it in time."
Shen Qianyu nodded.
Although both Shen Shiyan and Shen Shixiao were brought up by him, privately, he always pities Shen Shixiao more.
Shen Shixiao had a temperament similar to that of Song Wan, and never expressed any sadness or grievances. When he looked at Shen Shixiao, he could always think of Song Wan who was calm and calm everywhere.
If he could, he would like to see Shen Shixiao, but if he couldn't, that would be fine.
"I still don't trust you."
"Who will take care of your three meals a day? Clothing and food?"
Shen Qianyu's eyes were empty and he murmured to himself: "You are very serious and can't bear to talk to others about your inner affairs. You are afraid that others will not serve you well and you will not know how to speak..."
The more he spoke, the more unwilling he became, and the more tears came to his eyes.
There are thousands of maids and servants in the palace, but Wan'er cannot speak to them what is in his heart.
He was getting old, and the tears he shed were particularly sad and heartbreaking.
When Shen Shiyan received Liuyao's message, he left all the ministers behind and ran to the small courtyard. When he entered the room, Shen Qianyu was still holding Song Wan's hand and did not let go for a long time.
Seeing his first child, Shen Qianyu smiled faintly.
"Yan'er."
"The child is here."
Shen Shiyan knelt on his knees in front of the bed.
Shen Qianyu looked at him for a long time, and finally whispered: "Take care of your mother."
After a few words, all his strength was exhausted. Shen Qianyu felt sleepy and could not help but fall asleep lightly.
Everyone thought he wouldn't last long, but they didn't expect that he was unconscious for a long time and still had a breath left.
Even though he hasn't had a drop of water for many days, his chest still rises and falls slightly.
Seeing him like this, Song Wan couldn't eat for a long time.
"Mother, you go and have a rest, my father will be guarded by my children."
His mother-in-law had been waiting for her father for a long time, and her body had already been unable to bear the burden. Shen Shiyan looked distressed and asked the maid next to him to help Song Wan to take a rest on the couch.
Listening to the sound of breathing in his ears, Shen Shiyan knelt in front of the bed and cried silently.
Seeing that his father, who often carried himself on his shoulders with his young child, who was as tall as a mountain, now had black cheeks and a sunken chest, Shen Shiyan found it difficult to breathe.
He put his hand into the quilt and cried: "Father, please go, the child will be healthy and take care of the mother..."
"My mother is weak and can no longer withstand the suffering. Please forgive my child for being unfilial and saying such treacherous and unethical words."
Shen Qianyu's body has turned blue and black, and the imperial doctor also said that he is hanging with only one breath left, but in fact he has died long ago.
Someone from the Imperial Hospital once suggested that the Emperor should be put into the coffin first, and he died when he was told that he could not move it.
But Shen Shiyan didn't want this.
He didn't know what his father's unfulfilled wish was, but no matter what, he wanted his father to leave in peace.
Shen Qianyu's palms were cold, and Shen Shiyan couldn't warm him no matter how hard he held them.
"Stop crying."
Song Wan sat up from the couch and slowly walked to Shen Shiyan.
"I know what your father wishes, he..."
Song Wan smiled faintly and sat next to Shen Qianyu.
"Your father has a stubborn temperament, and no one can comfort him when it comes to matters he believes in. Now that his temper is getting worse, it's useless to say anything you say."
Touching Shen Shiyan's head tenderly, Song Wan asked, "Have we got our clothes ready?"
As soon as these words came out, Shen Shiyan knew what Song Wan meant. He was slightly stunned and then started to cry.
"Queen mother..."
"Go and do your work, I'll persuade him."
Pushing Shen Shiyan away, Song Wan looked at Shen Qianyu and laughed softly.
"I'm getting older and my memory is worse. These days, I always thought you were waiting for Xiao'er. Just when I lay down to take a rest, I suddenly remembered something."
"You said in the past that if today happens, you will definitely walk behind me. I guess this is what makes you unable to let go."
Song Wan raised his hand and gently touched Shen Qianyu's cheek.
She took care of him every day and never saw any changes in him, but every time she saw Shen Shiyan's shocked look when he came to greet him, Song Wan realized that he must be very scary now.
She has been married to Jiang Xingjian since she was a child. Ever since she can remember, she has known that Jiang Xingjian is her husband, the man with whom she will share her life in the future.
Before Jiang Xingjian returned to Beijing, Song Wanyu thought he had feelings for him.
She thought love in the world was like this, pale and indifferent.
But after meeting Shen Qianyu, she realized that love is like fire.
The feelings of youth are stored in the heart, in the corners of the eyebrows and eyes, and every move makes people's hearts move. After many years of getting along, those passionate feelings turned into concerns about warmth, warmth, hunger and food, and she finally understood the word love, which can be found in the trivial matters of life.
"The two of us have actually been an ordinary couple for the rest of our lives."
Song Wan pulled Shen Qianyu's hand away and rested it on his arm like he had for thousands of days and nights in the past.
"In the past, the listeners didn't care, but it took a lifetime to realize that the word "ordinary" is extremely unusual."
Putting his arms around Shen Qianyu's waist, Song Wan said, "In the next life, I will still be an ordinary couple with you."
Shen Shiyan waited in the courtyard for a long time. When the sky gradually darkened and there was still no sound from the house, he walked into the house with tears on his face.
There were two people lying on the bed in the room, just like the scene he would occasionally see when he broke into Changle Palace many years ago.
But he knew that no matter what noise he made, his father, emperor and mother, who had loved him all his life, would never chase him all over the palace angrily like they did when he was a child, while someone behind him would whisper to him carefully and not to fall.
"Your Majesty..."
Shen Shiyan knelt in the room and suddenly cried like a child.
He knew it, he knew it would happen today.
His father, emperor and mother have always been deeply in love, and even life and death cannot separate them...
He knows every song.
