"Don't get up."
Song Lianzhou sat down in front of the bed and stopped Shen Zhixi from getting up.
He sat for a while, looking towards the door.
Shen Zhixi was lying on his side, inexplicably a little nervous. It had been almost three years since the last time he slept in the same bed with him. He always felt in a trance, as if he hadn't woken up since he fell asleep that day. All that happened in Yuejing City later. Everything is still a dream.
After a long time, Song Lianzhou made the move to take off his coat.
Shen Zhixi felt even more worried and his throat was tight, "You...you really want to sleep here?"
He didn't speak, just opened the quilt and lay down.
Shen Zhixi could only move in as hard as he could. The words had already been spoken. If he didn't want to, there was no point in saying that he wanted to sleep with him.
He lay still and seemed to have his eyes closed.
It was pitch dark at night, there were no candles lit, and nothing could be seen clearly inside the tent.
The only clear sound was his breathing.
Shen Zhixi knew that he would not fall asleep so quickly. Something big had just happened and he probably needed to calm down for a while. But the fact that he can come back now shows that the Queen's condition should have improved and not worsened.
She couldn't sleep either, so she stared at the dark night with her eyes open.
In the darkness, Song Lianzhou suddenly spoke.
"Lily of the valley."
"Huh?" Shen Zhixi's heart skipped a beat and he became more energetic, "What?"
Her fingers holding the quilt were trembling slightly. The name Linglan seemed to be a word she had heard in her previous life, especially when it was pronounced from Song Lianzhou's mouth, it made her nose sore.
Song Lianzhou stopped talking and seemed to hesitate.
Just when Shen Zhixi thought he wouldn't speak again, he suddenly moved again, turned sideways towards her, and hugged her in his arms, "When can I truly have you, a complete you without worries or distracting thoughts?"
"...Is it, is something happening in the palace?"
Shen Zhixi changed the subject. She didn't dare to answer that question and couldn't answer it.
But Song Lianzhou didn't allow her to interrupt. He hugged her tighter and said, "I want you to love me and take me into your heart as much as I love you. Even if you need time, I'm willing to wait. As long as you nod and say you are willing." Give me a chance for yourself, and I can be satisfied just like that."
"you……"
"Linglan, I am a person, I am not a stone without feelings. Do you know how I got here these years? Why can you be so cruel? You make me fall in love with you and you make me hate you, but you are the only one You didn’t tell me how to let go of you. I can’t let go, I can’t let go of anything. Over the years, I can only let go of you temporarily when I’m on the battlefield without any distractions. But once I rest, I will still think of you and the person who worshiped me. The wife of heaven and earth."
He was choking and his voice was soft.
"You are my wife, Suzulan, you are my wife, we have worshiped heaven and earth and worshiped gods. You are my wife, we are husband and wife, do you understand?"
“……”
Shen Zhixi couldn't say a word, and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't hold back the tears falling from the corners of his eyes.
"Suzuland, I'm scared. I'm afraid that everyone around me will leave me. I'm afraid that I won't be able to keep the last one, including you. Suzuran, please promise me, at least give me a chance. Everyone in this world They are all different, there are good people and bad people, there are heartless people, there are people who are loyal to love all their lives, there are liars, there are also..."
When he should have been feeling sad, Shen Zhixi laughed out loud.
There were tears in his laughter, and he laughed more and more as he got angrier, "Are you mocking me again?"
"No." Song Lianzhou pressed closer to her, like a dog that insists on admitting its mistakes, "I didn't mean that, I just wanted to tell you..."
"I said you are a fool and you still don't admit it. Who in the right mind would keep a liar in his heart for so long?"
"Well, if you say I'm stupid, then I'm stupid."
"……Fool."
"Then, are you willing to promise me?"
Song Lianzhou returned to the topic just now, without giving Shen Zhixi any chance to interrupt. Shen Zhixi exhaled softly, thinking that he was really stupid and difficult to deal with.
"Then what you said before that you would let me go back to Yanzhou doesn't count?" she asked.
“Arithmetic, of course arithmetic.”
"Then...then what you said earlier about your threats that if I can't satisfy you and calm you down, you won't let me go, are all lies?"
Song Lianzhou sighed and said slowly: "How could I really threaten you."
"What about going back to Yanzhou?"
"If, if you still can't sincerely accept me in the end, I will let you go back."
Shen Zhixi couldn't answer. He closed his eyes for a long time before saying again: "I'd better take back what I said about you being a fool. You are not a fool. It is Tang Zhou who is fool. You Song Lianzhou is so smart. You know how to manipulate people's hearts. How could you be a fool?"
He uses her kindness to keep her, even if she doesn't move, she will feel guilty.
The better he is, the worse she will feel about herself and that she should make up for him.
How stupid is he? He is very smart.
"If you feel like you're being manipulated by me, it's not because I'm smart, it's because you have me in your heart. If you didn't have me in your heart and were ruthless, you wouldn't feel this way."
His words made Shen Zhixi's heart flutter again.
Listen, he is so eloquent and smart.
Shen Zhixi moved and turned away, but Song Lianzhou did not stop her, letting her turn around, and then hugged her from behind. Apart from the initial discomfort, Shen Zhixi seemed to have become accustomed to his hugs by now. After all, the acceptance of a man who has been with him for a long time will always be different.
"Don't worry, you can give me an answer tomorrow."
Song Lianzhou didn't force her to answer immediately, but Shen Zhixi didn't relax because of his words. She still had hesitation in her heart. She closed her eyes and tried to let herself fall asleep, so that she would not be upset again when she fell asleep.
But not long after, he opened his eyes again.
Recalling what Song Lianzhou had just said that he was afraid that everyone around him would leave him, she didn't quite understand it but she also heard some bad signs. The people around him must be his closest family members, his father and his sister.
Why did they leave him?
It seemed that there must be something fishy behind the Queen's vomiting of blood tonight, but it was hidden deep enough and not exposed. Otherwise, Song Lianzhou would not have been idle here rubbing her ears and cheeks, but he must have noticed it before he said such words.
“Karabune…”
"Suzuland, I'm a little tired these past two days."
"Then you sleep."
Shen Zhixi stopped speaking. The tiredness he said was probably because he was tired in his heart. For that imperial edict granting marriage, he must have had to deal with a lot of things. He probably felt more tired than going to the battlefield.
Soon, Song Lianzhou's breathing became slow and gentle.
As he listened, Shen Zhixi gradually fell asleep, and his breathing was as hypnotic as before.
